I’ve adored math since I was little and have always found joy in it. In my free time, I usually watch 3blue1brown or similar math channels. Since I'm not in college yet, my grasp of mathematics in the more "notation" sense isn't perfect, or like, at all, but I generally have a strong intuition for why things work. I can often see the underlying logic and predict how a problem will unfold.
I'm especially fascinated by quantum mechanics and quantum math. Grover’s algorithm and quantum computing in general are my absolute favorites. I love digging into the mechanics of how they're built. Of course, I realize this might just be because I get to cherry-pick the topics I enjoy. I’m currently in the equivalent-ish of an American high school 11th year junior (I'm not from the US), so studying these concepts independently is a lot more fun than being forced to grind through a rigid curriculum. Still, I feel like I naturally understand how the river flows. I spot patterns easily and feel I have a solid grasp on abstract logic.
With all that said, you’d assume I breeze through my math classes, but I honestly struggle. I never have a problem understanding the core concepts, but the moment a straightforward problem is put in front of me, I just kind of freeze or loop. I frequently end up with the wrong answer or freeze up entirely. Just today I was looking at a basic problem from four years ago:
3x * [(2x - 4) / 6] - (x / 3)^(2)
It’s an obviously simple equation, but I completely froze and couldn't work it out.
It feels incredibly humiliating, and I often feel like a fraud. Ultimately, I know I'm to blame. Back when we were first learning these foundational mechanics, I had a difficult teacher, COVID hit, and I never really put the effort in. Now, this gap have came back to haunt me I guess.
I’ve already printed out some worksheets to start practicing, since grinding through the calculations is probably the only way forward. But I’m really curious if anyone has also experienced this problem. If you have any feedback, tips, or similar stories, I would deeply appreciate them.
Thank you :)